Monday, May 11, 2020

The Sixth Edition Of "The KC Post"

May 4, 2020
Online Learning Confusion, Much Pandemonium
by Sam

Today when Sam did online learning, he got confused. There was a question that read: "At track and field day, 420 students are on teams of 15. You want to know how many students there are on each team." He thought it might mean how many teams are there, or there are 15 teams. He sent a message to his teacher. He waited, and waited, and waited, and waited, and waited, and waited, and waited and waited. Then his teacher sent a message back. It said: You're to write an equation to find out how many teams there are. The mystery was solved, and Sam could finish his work.

Landmark Celebrated Across KCUT
by Dave
The KCUT royal family celebrated a milestone this past weekend, as the Duchess Natasha marked her birthday with family and friends. The day began with a visit from members of a neighbouring realm, which took place on the grassy expanse of the south lawn. This was followed by a luncheon provided by the royal purveyor of sandwiches, a family-run establishment not far from KCUT’s borders.
Chefs in the kitchen worked for much of the afternoon, preparing a first-class dinner and dessert for the royal celebrants. Meanwhile, the duchess received phone calls and greetings from far and wide throughout the day, and a tribute was published in the official register. (You can read the tribute here.) At last, the time came for the formal birthday dinner of hand-crafted pizza, followed by gateau au fromage topped with raspberry-based art from an emerging avant-garde artist.
The celebrations continued the following day -- the royal family spent much of the day enjoying time on the grounds of the estate, and all present enjoyed a dinner featuring a grilled main course and a variety of green and pasta-based salads.

KCUT Royal Children Endure Forced March
by Natasha

Today the KCUT royal children underwent a forced march. "We wanted to ride our bikes," the royal children commented, "But instead we had to walk." Under the supervision of the royal guards, the children were forced to march for an endless forty-five minutes in search of libations so that the guards could continue their work.
Sadly, the rumour that libations could be acquired turned out to be false. "Then we had to walk back to the palace," mourned Princess Rachel. They children had to brave chilling winds, and extreme boredom, while dodging obstacles and having the guards continuously at their heels.
Once they returned to the palace, they were restored with jelly beans and Minecraft on their iPads. "Maybe it wasn't so bad," Prince Sam was overheard to be saying. "I hear there's a rumour we might have to do it again tomorrow though."

THE WALK FOR NOTHING
by Rachel

Today, Natasha, Dave, Sam and Rachel went on a walk to get beer at the LCBO (liquor store, for you non-Ontario people). First, Natasha and Dave asked the kids to get ready for the walk. We had to go the bathroom and dress warmly, to make sure we didn’t complain about being cold. Then, they started to walk. They walked and walked and walked and walked and walked. Next, they got to the liquor store (LCBO), but it turned out that they went on a walk for NOTHING, because they found out that the LCBO was CLOSED on Mondays. Womp womp wo-wo-wo-womp. Finally, they walked and walked and walked and walked and walked until they got home

May 5, 2020
Cinco de Mayo
by Sam

Cinco de Mayo
Have a happy holiday
Yay for Mexico

Malted Beverage Crisis Averted
by Dave
 
Citizens of KCUT were alarmed earlier this week, when supplies of beer, gin drinks, and other similar beverages began to run dangerously low. The KCUT royal family had anticipated this possibility, and stocked up several weeks ago on essential supplies, such as six-packs of Corona beer, local gin-mint-citrus concoctions, and various ales from local breweries.
However, an increase in consumption rate by the KCUT populace, particularly the 25-40 year old male demographic, coupled with limited capacity in the KCUT warehouse, led to a severe shortage at the beginning of this past week. Faced with a crisis, local importer/exporter Dave made several attempts to replenish the stockpile; however, he was initially stymied by unexpected closures from several key suppliers, and was unable to complete the arrangements as initially planned.
Thankfully, Dave was able to rendezvous with his primary supplier on Tuesday, and KCUT citizens were once again able to enjoy the ales, lagers, stouts, and other malted beverages to which they had become accustomed.
When asked for comment, associate supplier Natasha responded: “Let’s just say that this is why I’m in charge of buying the food around here!”

Cinco De Oreo
by Natasha

Today the KCUT citizens celebrated the little known holiday of Cinco De Oreo. It started off as marking the more famous Mexican holiday of Cinco De Mayo. There were tacos, Corona beer, and more tacos.
However, during the celebratory dinner, Prince Sam had a toothache, and the celebrations devolved from there. Retreating into a private area, the prince lay down to read a book. Moments later, he returned holding the prize of a tooth.
Deciding that this occasion needed to be observed in a more chocolate-y manner, the royal kitchens brought out the dessert and thus the celebration took a ninety degree turn, becoming less about tacos and more about Oreos.
"I think we need to celebrate Cinco De Oreo every day," Princess Rachel remarked. The queen, her mouth too full of Oreos to speak, nodded vigorously in agreement.

May 6, 2020
DISNEY FAIRY TALE WEDDINGS!!!!
by Rachel

On Tuesday, Rachel and her Mom started watching Disney Fairy Tale Weddings. The show is so romantic, and people kiss – mwah!  People get married at Disneyland, and it costs lots of money, maybe a million dollars! One couple got married at midnight, and had a Happily Ever After fireworks show. Another couple got married at 6 in the morning, and got to turn Sleeping Beauty’s castle pink. One couple even got married on a CRUISE SHIP! Rachel and her Mom have watched four episodes in 24 hours, and she is really excited to watch more.


Exercise Video aka. Torture
by Sam

Today Sam and Rachel's mom thought it would be a good idea to try an exercise video
from school. It wasn’t. It was torture. First, they had to warm up. That part wasn’t too bad. Then came the hard part. They had to do a various amount of exercises that were super hard. They were all exhausted by the end… of the first cycle. Yep, they had to do the same thing 3 TIMES!!!!!!!!!!! It was crazy! They also didn’t get a water break, and there was no cool down, and cool downs are very important.
It was clearly hard difficult insane torture. 😉

May 7, 2020 
Cemetery Tour Part 2
by Sam

Today Sam, Rachel and Natasha did another cemetery tour. They brought jelly beans too, (again). Today they visited the graves of Catharina Hollinger, Friedrich Rittinger, Henry S. and Alan Huber, Emil Vogelsang, W. D. Euler, Catherine Ubel, Hugo Carl and Carl Kranz, Johann Peter Schneider, William H. Schmalz and George Davidson Sr. Then it got very windy, so they headed home.

Cemetery Walk!!!
by Rachel

Today Rachel, Sam and Natasha went on cemetery walk. A cemetery walk is where you go around and look for people and then learn about them or their family or children. A few weeks ago we started the cemetery walk and we continued today. I personally like the cemetery walk because I love learning about the history of our city and how people came here. Every time we go we always pack jelly beans (so far). When we get to the cemetery we start off where we stopped last time.  

New Restaurant Opens
by Dave
 
Thanks to an unprecedented surplus in the royal storehouses, KCUT welcomed a new restaurant this past week. Known locally as “The Fridge”, this hip eatery serves a variety of primarily vegetarian cuisine, from baked pasta topped with cheese to South Georgia Caviar, leftover pizza to made-to-order nachos, as well as a variety of soups, salads, and beverages. While some items, such as Lazy Shepherd’s Pie, haven’t caught on immediately with some of the younger clientele, head chef Natasha is willing to try new dishes, as well as variations on established favourites, in an effort to “get some darn vegetables into these customers,” as she colourfully put it.
Associate chef Dave, known for fan favourites such as challah French toast and chocolate chip pancakes, commented that the restaurant’s menu changes often, based on seasonal availability of locally-sourced ingredients, current cutting-edge trends in cuisine, and whether certain clientele will “deign to eat a lentil every now and then.” Overall, he feels that the restaurant does an admirable job of offering a variety of healthy menu items, while still ensuring that customers feel encouraged to come to the table and enjoy an occasional comfort-food meal. Regular clientele should be on the lookout for upcoming additions to the menu, including chiens chaud, baked lentil surprise, and the chef’s special, otherwise known as “whatever doesn’t get eaten at lunchtime.”

May 8, 2020
DR. MOMMY SAVES RACHEL
by Rachel

Today Rachel woke up feeling sick :( She went downstairs to play iPad. She ate something because she thought that she felt sick because she was hungry, but after she was still feeling sick. Next, her mom woke up and came downstairs, and then Rachel told her mom that she was not feeling well. Her mom told her to lie down on the couch and close her eyes. After that, Rachel was feeling so sick that she felt like she was going to throw up, so she told her mom, and then they rushed to the sink. Rachel waited and waited, and then – blaaah! -- she threw up.  After that, Rachel went back to the couch to lie down for a while. Finally, Rachel’s mom asked her if she wanted to watch Disney Fairy Tale Weddings, and Rachel said yes. Then, she was CURED!

Mystery Illness
by Sam

Last night Sam was plagued by a mystery illness. Medics are still unsure what it was that ailed him. They also have no known cure. Luckily the illness went away, and Sam woke up fine the next morning. “We have no idea what it was, and hope not to encounter it again. But if we do, we are working on a cure, and will be prepared next time” said famous doctor, Dr. Natasha. Whatever the sickness is, it seems to be non-contagious, so it shouldn’t spread, and is hopefully gone for good.

KCUT Adds On Greenhouse
by Natasha

The KCUT royal palace added a greenhouse to its structure this past week. "It wasn't a part of our original plans," explained gardener Natasha, "but with the weather in the KCUT this so called 'spring,' the necessity of a greenhouse became increasingly apparent."
A truckload of flowers was delivered to the palace this week, in preparation for the spring planting and it was obvious that, with snow in the forecast, the many annuals would die if planted outside already. Thus, alternate plans had to be made to keep the flowers alive.
"It does add some warmth to the palace having all these flowers," Princess Rachel commented. "Although it does make it harder to play baseball inside," Prince Sam added. "That's a good reason to keep the greenhouse as a permanent structure," the queen muttered under her breath.
There are hopes that with the weather improving, the greenhouse will be a temporary measure, but stay tuned for further updates...

5 comments:

  1. Sounds like a pretty busy week with a walk to nowhere and sicknesses. Hope everyone is feeling better.

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  2. I hear you on the consumption of alcoholic beverages. We stocked up on beer but that just makes it easier to drink! We are currently out of wine, so we will be stopping in at the LCBO this week for sure.

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  3. Matt is brewing beer in one of our kitchen cabinets. I threw out the yeast by accident thinking they were just ketchup packets. Matt agreed to stay married to me and we were able to order more yeast.
    We both need a drink...lol.

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  4. I love this so much, so creative and I love that everyone participates. It was a real nail-biter over whether y'all would get more beer! ;)

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  5. I had a hearty laugh over the forced libations march and beverage crisis. There seems to be a theme in this edition and I like it. :)

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Thank you for being interested in my life as I blog it and for leaving a comment. Comments make me happier than reading a good book and drinking a cold Coke. Almost :)